That's my hand on the left, Julie's on the right. Examine the nails, please.
See how Julie's are lovely and modelesque? They haven't looked that good since our wedding day, when she had a French manicure. And see how mine are nibbled away like hunks of cheese in a rat cage? An expert would take one glance at our two sets of nails and conclude that we're with child.
Go with me on this. I've always been a gnawer, but it's been especially bad lately. I think it's stress, becoming a dad and all. Not that I feel stressed, but why else would I punish my nails so?
Meanwhile, a pregnant woman's nails grow faster than usual. But why isn't Julie stressed? Easy: I'm her husband!
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