Cousin It

Today Julie requested via email that I make her a hair appointment for 11:00 on Saturday. I could tell she thought it was rather obnoxious, for her last line was "Does this make me a beeatch?"

There is a line. Pancakes at 6:20 in the morning is barely under the line, but scheduling hair appointments is over the line. I teach teenagers and generally dislike authority, so I am familiar with the idea of sticking a toe over the line to test whether the line truly exists.

And if that silly woman thinks she can get all Miranda Priestly on me, then I'll just toss my cellphone into a Paris fountain and get down with my fabulous self. What, you think my Devil Wears Prada allusion compromises my masculinity? Hey, I just denied a pregnant woman a hair appointment. I got it in spades, dawg.