Stay

Julie is 29 weeks pregnant. I still struggle processing time in terms of weeks and instead opt to divide everything by 4. So she's 7.25 months pregnant, but that's of course assuming that every month has 28 days in it. Really, she's probably more like 6.8923.

Twice this past week I've given women the pregnancy update and heard them say, "That's when I went into labor." Twice. And now I'm kinda freaked.

Let me tell you about all the reasons having a baby at this instant would be a bad thing.

1. I don't know where the hospital is. We go to the doctor one place and deliver someplace else. I should probably mapquest that at some point.

2. The suitcase isn't packed, and I wouldn't even know what to put in it anyway. Diapers? Spit-up blankets? Yeah, we don't have any of that stuff.

3. The crib has not arrived. The baby would have to sleep in a drawer.

4. We don't have a car seat, so I guess the baby wouldn't sleep in a drawer. I've heard the nurses tase you in the parking lot if you don't have a car seat. Of course, we'd have to know where the hospital is in order to be tased by nurses, so yeah.

5. Tiger Woods 2009 just came out for the PS3, and I'd like to buy it and play it a little before becoming a dad. Don't judge me.

I could go on. Let's hope our daughter likes her home now and doesn't suddenly decide to go exploring.