Names

At Julie's ultrasound in June, we plan to learn the sex of the child. That is, unless the little imp decides to moon us rather than flash us. Once we know, or are almost certain, or have a general hunch, the great name debate will begin.

Currently, our dog Tulip is the most compelling predictor that I will have no say whatsoever. "You got to name the mutt, so I get to name the kid" will not stand, of course, but I'll give it a shot anyway.

I already feel as though Julie has first say on the middle name, since she took my last name when we married--though anybody who knows us would agree that my last name is more aesthetically pleasing than her maiden name. I'm just saying.

I'm in trouble with my in-laws now, aren't I.

Anyhow, I'll at least demand approval rights on all first names, being that I'm a teacher and all. I mean think about it: I've known several thousand teenagers. If you've ever gotten below a C in my class, we're officially not naming our kid after you. Sorry. In life, there are consequences.

But I do like the suggestions we've gotten. My favorite so far is Aquaman. As stated by a gentleman in period 3 (whose name was eliminated in 2001), if we put the kid on the swim team, then during meets the announcer will say, "In lane four is Aquaman." And the other kids will just quit. Genius.

Maybe it's better that I'll have no say whatsoever.